2020 · Blogging · Bully · Church of England · Clergy Wife · England · Faith · Forgiveness · God · Left Handed · Midsomer Murders · Rural · Scotland · Scottish Highlands · Tears · Vicarage · Village

Bullies are Cowards!

I was excited to be moving to England.  I had never been to England just to London.  All I knew about England was through Midsomer Murders!  I was disappointed that there was no John Lewis in Oxford but never mind.

I was excited about finding a job in England.  In Scotland, I was self employed. I was nervous about working in the outside world but I needed to get stuck in. 

Despite being well qualified, I wasn’t getting past the interview stages. I was frustrated.  There was a firm in our village and I decided to email my CV to the owner (who was to become my boss). Just that they were not hiring!!!’ I got a reply the next day.  I started work on the  21st of September! I was elated.  It was my dream job!

Sadly for me, I knew by day two that I was unhappy in that office. My boss was a couple of years older than me. He was hot tempered and got very angry at the drop of a hat. I was often afraid that he might throw something at me! His behaviour was erratic.  Was he a bully?  I had never met a bully before so I quickly brushed that thought aside.  How wrong I was!

I didn’t want to resign because it had been so so difficult trying to find a job.

My boss monitored my every movement including my emails, phone calls. etc. I knew I was being monitored.  Thankfully I could walk home for lunch so was able to get some respite. I felt trapped. 

I dreaded going to work.

By Christmas that year, I was so stressed that I had developed ulcers all over inside my mouth. Despite all the emotional sufferings, I never missed a day’s work!

The final straw that broke the camel’s back was one Friday in February when my boss CONFISCATED my chair for about 2 hours!!!! I had to type a report standing. He found it all amusing. Was this really happening to me? Me a middle aged woman being treated like a naughty child?

I served my one months’s notice.

What was supposed to have been a very happy start to my life in England had made me homesick and miserable.

A few years later, just when I thought that I had put this very sad chapter of my life behind,  I heard that this person was preparing to become a Church of England Ordinand!!!!! Don’t these things only happen in the movies???

It has been many years since this happened but it still feels very raw. I will always remember the 21st of September for all the wrong reasons!